You Know It's a Full Moon when....

...or almost-full moon.

Conversation between me and a patient checking in yesterday.

Patient registering into triage hands me the check-in sheet with the chief complaint.

Kimberly (me) reads the sheet:

K: "So. You got bit my a monkey."
P: "Yes." (nothing more said.)
K: " You are sure it was a monkey."
P: "Oh..yes."
K: (not sure where to go with this.) "Was it your monkey" (she really doesn't look like an animal trainer)
P: "No."
K: (looking at swelling on the hand) "When did this happen?"
P: (she glances at the clock and calculates) "Oh, about 7:30 this morning." (it is now 10:00am)
K: "How did this happen?"
P: "I was walking down Main Street (street name changed to protect the innocent) and there was a man with a monkey, and I went to pet it and it bit me."
K: "Do you know if the monkey is up on all his shots?"
P: "No, the man and the monkey ran away after it happened."

Morals to the story:
1. Do not pet angry monkeys
2. Remove all rings and jewelry from swelling hands ASAP
3. Call authorities if an angry monkey is on the loose. Running men with monkeys is usually not a good thing.
4. You never know what is walking on main street.
5. Anything can happen on a full moon.
6. Anything can happen in the ED.